Emotions are what give meaning and flavor to the world around us. Our ability to give value and meaning to our interpretation of the world around us is governed by our emotional health.
In the summer of 2017, I was hired to help design and build a health club in Salt Lake City. I proposed a club design way out of the ordinary and for the first time in my career, the owner gave me a budget and said, “Do it!”
With that, I designed what was (to my knowledge) the very first hybrid health and fitness club in the USA. I took all the elements of a regular commercial gym and combined them with a highly successful garage gym concept. It was a smashing success. At least for some folks. For some of the regular, more traditional commercial gym folks, well, that was a different story.
On our first day of operation, I was teaching a GPP class on the main floor. GPP is the style of training I do in group settings. I hybridized the gym which meant I was conducting classes on an open floor in the middle of a busy commercial gym. It was ELECTRIC! The atmosphere and the music was pumping. There were roughly 20 participants in the class and we were going for it. In GPP classes, we use specialized equipment like barbells, KBs and dumbbells. The bars are reinforced and the weights are rubberized. It is common to drop bars and weights when using this setup. That was one of the things making the atmosphere so electric! Weights were dropping all over the place. To me, when weights are dropped like this, it’s like symbols crashing at the end of a great rock song! I loved it. I thought everyone did. Turns out I was wrong.
In the middle of the class, from across the room came a furious, booming voice, “CAN’T YOU PEOPLE CONTROL THE WEIGHTS?!
I ignored this. I was busy coaching and didn’t want to stop to explain myself. I figured he’d watch for a few minutes and connect the dots himself.
NOPE.
A few minutes later, I looked up to see a giant storming toward me. He was furious. Red-faced and frothing at the mouth as he continued to yell at me, “IF YOUR PEOPLE CAN’T CONTROL THEIR WEIGHTS, THEY NEED GET OUT OF THIS GYM!”
I tried to explain to him how it works in this new style of gym. I tried to help him understand, but he couldn’t control himself. He had let himself become too angry. He was even shaking. He went on and on. He yelled and cursed at me over and over. He yelled and cursed at one of the ladies who was standing there trying to calm him. He stormed into the office and yelled at the manager. He yelled at the front desk staff. Ultimately, he quit the gym and demanded a refund.
His uncontrolled emotions didn’t just affect his day, his emotions affected everyone within earshot of his outbursts. The girl standing closest to him turned white and went from smiling to terrified.
Humans are emotional beings. Our emotions, especially the negative ones (fear, anxiety, rage), were likely beneficial in early evolutionary times. Our strong emotional responses to dangerous and potentially dangerous situations (think, leopard attacks) made it possible to thrive as a species against much stronger predators. Without these strong emotions, humans would never have made it off of the savannah. We are lucky to have them, since even today, there are times where they can keep us safe. The problem is, lack of control of our negative emotions can lead to poor health. Not just for you. It will affect everyone within your emotional reach.
Keep in mind, our emotions aren't just some random spices thrown into the soup of life. They're the very essence of our experiences. Suppressing them isn't the answer; it's about learning to dance with them. We need to give ourselves permission to feel without judgment, and that's where emotional health comes in. Coping well with feelings, whether they are positive or negative, is healthy and noble. But this takes practice. Emotional health isn’t something you fix once and forget about. It’s something you manage daily—like brushing your teeth, except way more people ignore it.
How to Improve Emotional Health
Write it out.
Get your thoughts out of your head and onto paper. No filter, no cleanup. Just dump it. Most people aren’t overwhelmed because life is too hard—they’re overwhelmed because everything’s stuck in their head with nowhere to go.
Breathe on purpose.
When things start to spike, slow it down. Take 10–15 real, intentional breaths. This isn’t woo-woo—it’s control. You’re buying yourself a moment so you can respond like an adult instead of reacting like a grenade.
Sit still for a minute.
You don’t need a meditation app and a candle. Just sit. Be quiet. Notice what’s going on without trying to fix it. That space between you and your emotions? That’s where control lives.
Use music strategically.
Stop letting your mood pick your music—flip it. Build playlists for where you want to go emotionally, not just where you are. Music is one of the fastest ways to shift your state if you actually use it on purpose.
Check in with yourself.
A few times a day, ask: “What am I feeling right now?” Most people don’t do this… and then wonder why things blow up later.
Learn what’s actually going on.
If you don’t understand your emotions, you’re always going to feel like they’re running the show. A solid place to start is by reading “The Body Keeps the Score” Bessel Van Der Kolk. It’ll change how you see stress, trauma, and why you react the way you do.
Take care of your body.
This is the part people want to skip—but it’s the foundation. Eat real food. Move your body. Sleep like it matters. Your emotional state isn’t separate from your physical health—it’s built on top of it.
Remember, emotional health isn’t a one-size-fits-all deal. Just like your fingerprint, your emotional journey is uniquely yours. Emotional health isn’t something you “arrive at.” It’s something you practice. Daily. Quietly. Imperfectly. And the better you get at understanding your emotions, the less controlled you become by them.