Stress is a bad thing. We all know this. The problem is, most of us over 45 aren’t taking deliberate steps to do anything about it. This is a mistake. If left unchecked, stress can become chronic and cause many serious health problems, including:
Depression, anxiety and personality disorders
Heart disease, high blood pressure, abnormal heart rhythms, heart attacks and stroke
Obesity, eating disorders
Menstrual problems
Loss of sexual desire
My First Meditation Experience
I had the weirdest experience once. It was a meditation experience. I’m not sure why I tried meditation since I was positive it wasn’t going to help. Meditation isn’t typically a 40+ thing, but it did help. It changed my life. It opened my mind to possibilities I had never imagined before.
I was going through a rough patch. Recently divorced. Broke as hell. Hungry. Wasn’t seeing my kids as often as I wanted. Love those damn kids. Missed them. Wasn’t sleeping much. I slept in the loft above my friend’s garage, but I pretty much lived out of my car. I kept everything in it. When it got stolen I lost almost everything. During this time I felt as lonely, worthless and hopeless as I have ever felt in my life.
To calm my mind, I worked a lot. I’d get up around 04:45 every morning, get ready and drive 35 minutes to get to my gym where I’d work until about noon. To try and get on top of things, I took another job at another gym 35 minutes across the valley in the opposite direction. I had to be there at 1pm and stay until 8 every night. Rough hours.
On top of all of this I’d caught a bug. This slowly turned into pneumonia. Now I was sick, depressed, overworked and desperate as hell.
On the way home from work one night, I was driving by a semi-famous yoga studio in my area. The place was packed. A sign said “Meditation Event Tonight.” I’m not sure what came over me. I hit the brakes in my rental, crossed four lanes of traffic, spun around and dipped into the parking lot.
“Are you here for the meditation event?” the quirky looking tattooed lady with blonde beaded hair asked with a smile.
“Yep.” I felt like an imposter. I was an imposter. She knew it too.
“Have you ever been to a sound-bath meditation?”
“Well, no, but I have meditated before.” I hadn’t. I didn’t want to lie, but I felt like she was trying to disqualify me. I wanted to pass the test.
“Sir, this is a TWO HOUR meditation event.” She did a metaphorical mic drop and turned her back on me.
“Do you guys take cash?”
“Sir,” She sighed. “Most people have to work up to two-hour meditations. This is an advanced class. Maybe you’d be happier if you came back to our beginner series?” She pulled out a schedule and started pointing to boxes and lines with a pencil.
“I’m good. I want this one.”
She was frustrated with me but sold me a ticket. Triumphantly, I walked into the large room only to stand there dumbfounded and embarrassed. Everyone, like 100 people, had gear. By gear I mean, they had pajamas, blankets, floor padding and multiple pillows. I had nothing.
I asked the super authentic looking couple to my right if they knew where I could get a pad and pillow. The nice lady pointed toward the wall. With that, I was able to grab a pad, blanket and pillow from the extras the studio had lying around.
Like I said, the place was packed with people. Bodies everywhere. The only spot left big enough for me to spread out was right down in the front. I was cool with that.
The stage was as awesome looking as you’d imagine. There were uniquely carved and decorated bowls made of wood, crystal and metal sitting on elevated platforms. They were in all different sizes and colors, many with elaborately decorated and carved decorations. There were lots of drums. Some were huge, some tiny. There were also lots of shakers, some of them were tambourine looking noisemakers, others were dried up gourds with white seashells and colorful beads draped over them. The gongs were the coolest, especially the large, brass colored one. It must have been 4-5 feet in diameter. Couldn’t wait to hear that one shake the air. All of this was sitting on top of multiple, traditional looking red and yellow Persian rugs which were backed by hanging tapestries with “ohm” signs and “peace” signs woven into them. Classic stuff!
Then the lady came out. She absolutely looked the part. Dark dreadlocks flowing out from under a knitted, colorful beanie. She had a long, dry, sun-weathered face. Beads and stones draped around her neck and on her fingers. She wore light colored flowing robes and colorful scarves.
She walked out meekly, palms pressed together, head bowed. She sat down cross legged and hit the big gong right off the bat. Money! Then she hit a few of the bowls. I was close enough to them I felt my skull vibrate. Awesome. She said only one thing all night. It was this:
“If you are lucky enough to get a vision tonight, go with it. Go with it as far as you can.”
Ok?
Three minutes into the session I knew I had made a mistake. The chick was chanting, gonging and drumming her heart out. Meanwhile my ADHD had just checked in and I was already bored as shit. No way was I going to make it through two whole hours of this. I looked up toward the back of the room. There were several dozen people between me and the door. I’d have to interrupt the entire class and step over the top of them if I wanted to go. I was stuck.
Shit.
Maybe I could just take a nap. I was pretty tired anyway. I laid back and surrendered to the moment.
As I laid there, I started to drift deeper and deeper into my breathing. Then something cool happened. The lady started playing one of the bowls in a long continuous tone. It vibrated so loud it made my throat tickle and my skull just behind my ears was vibrating. Such a weird feeling. It helped me relax. I fell deeper and deeper into my breathing. As I was lying there relaxing with my throat and ears vibrating, the deepest, most violet light I have ever seen came on.
“What a cool effect,” I thought to myself. It must have been right above me, it was so intense. The light changed colors with each different sounding bowl. From purple it turned blue, then green, then orange. After a few minutes of this I became super curious about how they were doing this. As it turned deep red, I popped my eyes open to see the light. There was nothing. No light. What a coincidence, they turned it off at the exact time I opened my eyes. Weird. Back to relaxing. After a minute the colors came back. Opened my eyes. Nothing, again.
“What in the hell was going on? How are they doing this?
Eventually I stopped trying to figure it out and just went with it. So glad I did. I went on a ride. That night I transcended. I saw things. I did things. I understood things like never before.
It was such a beautiful experience. Maybe it’s not a story I could tell to folks near my age, though. They wouldn’t believe it. If it hadn’t happened to me I wouldn’t believe it either.
This experience came to me at a dire point in my life. Had it not been there for me that night, I’m not positive I would be here today. It also came to me at a very pivotal time in my career. It has helped give me strength and calmness of mind to pursue a very different direction with my future.
What I learned most from this experience is there is another side of life that warrants attention. The attention we spend on calming and controlling our inner selves is as critical to our health as anything else we can do.
The inner self can best be reached and influenced through calmness and quiet meditation. In the quietness of your calm mind is where you will find many answers. It’s where you transcend above the more primal thinking. It’s where you may wander around in pure cerebral thought not marred by negative emotions. That’s the most productive, meaningful and helpful type of thought.
Just like exercise, meditation should be done every single day. Just like exercise, start small with a minute or two then slowly build up.
Mind clearing is the goal. A solid minute of a clear mind will work wonders for body and soul.
To clear the mind and begin your first meditation session try this:
Sit comfortably or lie down.
Close your eyes.
Take several slow deep breaths. No fewer than three.
On your last breath, inhale deeply and hold it.
Acknowledge thoughts and feelings as you let them drift by.
Hold it.
Hold.
Now let it out slowly.
Keep pushing it out.
Keep pushing …
Now hold.
5…4…3…2…1… Hold …
Now breathe in!
Feel that rush? Those are endorphins; actual drugs. People pay for that shit. BTW, you just meditated. You just improved your health! Repeat this as often throughout your day as necessary.