Warm-up - 4 rounds of:

200m jog (1/2 speed)
1 min sit squat hip mobility

4 rounds of: 

8 power cleans (moderate wt.)
burnout set of v-ups
90 sec. rest

Post weights used to comments.

Daily Extras - 3 sets of:

burnout V-twists 15/20
rest 60 sec.

Workout Notes:

  • burnout sets? 
  • Remember, a burnout set is a max effort push.
  • The point of the sit squat hip mobility exercise is to incr flexibility. It's not a work set. It's not a static hold. Sit right down on your calves if you can. 
  • The power cleans are to be done at a moderate weight. Work on your form here.
  • Each rep is touch and go. Dropping between reps negates the purpose and some of the benefits. 

  • Learn the "thigh bump" technique - ask your trainer. It's a technique that improves athleticism and helps to prevent you from trying to muscle this movement. 

  • How to know if you are using a moderate weight? A moderate weight is heavy, but doesn't top out. IOW you shouldn't be maxed out at rep #8. You should have a few left in the tank. Not a whole set, but more than just 1. If you completed your set and you knew you could do 1-3 more, that's a moderately weighted set. 
  • Stay plastic with your weights today. The weight you start with might be different from the weight you end with. This is cool. 
  • Don't waste sets. If you do a set that seemed easy to you - don't count it. Rest for a bit (90s), put more weight on and try it again. Only count sets you consider to be "moderately weighted."

I saw colors, I was a 3 foot beaver (or monkey) and had visions ... 

Part III

Our instructor didn't say much, at least, not much that I could hear. I found it weird that she was trying to speak at all. She's sitting there on the floor surrounded by different bowls, rattles and a gong. Looked like a hippie drum kit. Srsly! Each bowl was a different size and made a different sound. A LOUD sound. And there she was making those bowls hum while rolling a stick (wand?) around the rims.  

They were humming so loud that they literally vibrated my insides. You know that feeling you get in your throat when those dumb kids pull up next to you in your car with their sub-woofer cranked all the way up while blasting EMINEM? It's the same feeling. But the cool thing is while it is vibrating your throat, you can hear the circular motions of the wand rubbing around the insides of the bowls. The sounds go in one ear and out the other depending upon which way the wand is moving. I found the vibrations mesmerizing and somewhat comforting. And I became lost in the movements of the sounds.

But I also became bored!

The nice lady warned me of this. She said I'd hate it and she was right, I was totally hating it. Now I was panicking. "How the hell am I going to get out of this?" I'd only been laying there on the floor for 10-15 minutes (probably more like 2-5 in actuality, but it seemed like 20!) and I was already thinking, "Damn, this was a mistake. There is NO FRICKIN WAY I can do 2 hours of this!" 

So I began plotting my escape. The problem was, I had parked my happy ass right up on the front row. If I got up in the middle of the meditation and tried to walk out, I was surely going to disturb a bunch of nice people who were trying hard to concentrate. And I don't know much about meditation, but I get the feeling that enlightenment is a pretty fleeting thing. If someone is in the beginning throws of becoming enlightened, it stands to reason that it only takes one misplaced hick from Northern Utah stepping over the top of her to screw it all up. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind the thought of pissing off Todd and Margo, but they were on the back row. I'd have to step over the top of no fewer than 7 bodies before I'd even get to Christmas Vacation their asses.

I figured I'd wait until there was a natural break in the music before gracefully picking up my things and making my exit. Of course, having never been to one of these things before, I didn't even know if they took breaks. I mean, it's not really a concert and she wasn't really playing songs. Crap. I was feeling stuck.

So instead of being "that guy" I decided to just lay there and wait for a more polite time to escape. That's when something cool happened. 

I saw a purple light. 

My eyes were mostly closed as I was laying on the floor and the light was pleasant. Not bright. Not harsh. It was just an intensely interesting purple colored glow that filled up the inside of my eyelids. 

It didn't really shock me. I figured the studio had a purple light rigged up for the occasion and just flicked it on. I thought it was a cool affect. Plus I was super bored and was grateful for the distraction. I opened my eyes to see where it was coming from in the studio, but as I opened my eyes, it went off. So, I just closed my eyes and went back to trying to fall asleep. 

Then I saw a blue light. 

I opened my eyes to see the light, but again it went off before I could see it. 

Then I saw green, then orange, then red. Each time I'd open my eyes to see the lights in the studio, but each time there were none. That's when I realized - I've totally lost my shit! 

To be honest, I didn't care. I loved the colors. They were calming. They soothed me. They made me smile so, I just laid there watching them and grinning about it, wondering "srsly WTH?"

Next thing I know, I'm in a Forrest hopping around, looking under rocks, pushing plants aside and climbing trees. I'm all alone and perfectly happy about it which seems weird, but not as weird as what I see when I look at a reflection of myself in a nearby pool of water, but that's a story for another time.

To be continued ...